The binmen
resent me. However when I run I have to taste their bins as they speed past me so
the feeling is mutual.
I have an
embarrassingly poor relationship with a security guard who ignores my advances
for a Rocky moment.
I scare
homeless people with my panting.
If you run with
a bottle of water in your hand you can get away with anything. Although it adds
weight.
I can steel part
of my day back by getting up early. This stolen day doesn’t require working or
texting.
An athlete
named Paula did a poo in a marathon.
My leisure
pants get heavy when it rains.
My nipples
chafe when it rains.
I’m reluctant
to have banter with other smug runners.
The skin on my
feet is getting tough.
Running with my
hair down makes me look like a talentless wizard.
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